by Corinne Berry, PhD
Stored Intentions
People often talk about being organized as if it’s a personality trait — something you either naturally have or you don’t.
“I’ve just never been an organized person.”
“My brain doesn’t work that way.”
"I wish I had the organization gene.”
But I don’t think organization is a trait we’re born with (or without). I think it’s a state. And that distinction and the language we use matters more than we realize.
Because when we treat organization like a fixed trait, it creates two categories of people: the organized and the disorganized. The people who “have it together” and the people who never will. That mindset leaves very little room for growth, learning, support, or change.
The truth is that organizing is a learned set of skills. It’s something we practice, refine, maintain, and revisit throughout different seasons of life. And yes — unfortunately — that also means it requires effort. (I know. I wish I could tell you otherwise.)
But the good news is that the state of “being organized” is available to everyone.
What My Background in Behavioral Science Taught Me
Before I became a professional organizer, I worked as a behavioral scientist in public health. My job was to understand how people think, feel, and act related to their health and wellbeing. I spent years talking to people about behavior change — what experiences shaped them, what felt difficult, what they wanted or needed to know, and why certain habits felt impossible to maintain.
One of the clearest examples was physical activity.
People talk about “being fit” in a way that sounds remarkably similar to how they talk about “being organized.” There’s often shame, guilt, dread, overwhelm, avoidance, and the feeling that everyone else somehow has it figured out better than they do. There are good intentions, repeated restarts, bursts of motivation, and frustration when change doesn’t happen as quickly as they hoped. People often fall into all-or-nothing thinking — believing that if they can’t do it perfectly, there’s no point in trying at all.
But decades of behavioral science research tell us something different: change usually doesn’t happen all at once. It happens in stages, through small shifts, repeated actions, and habit formation over time.
One of the most widely known models — the Transtheoretical Model, or “Stages of Change” — explains that people gradually move from precontemplation to contemplation, preparation, action, and eventually maintenance. In other words, most people don’t wake up one day suddenly transformed.
They build change incrementally. And importantly, people often need support moving from one stage to the next.
That’s why we hire trainers, join gyms, follow programs, or seek accountability. Sometimes we’re looking to learn new skills or create a realistic plan. Other times, we simply need support, encouragement, and empathy to help us get mentally ready for change. We need someone to help us believe progress is possible and give us structure for where to begin.
Organizing works much the same way.
Sometimes people need help creating systems or learning practical strategies. Other times, they need help getting unstuck — figuring out where to start after feeling overwhelmed for a long time. A professional organizer can help create both the framework and the momentum. Then over time, those systems become habits that require less energy and decision-making to maintain.
Not effortless, of course — but easier.
Organization Is Not Perfection
The systems that work for you today may not work six months from now. A new baby, a move, a demanding season at work, aging parents, kids’ activities, or simply burnout can completely shift what your home needs from you.
That doesn’t mean you failed. It means your systems need to evolve.
Organization is not about achieving some perfect final state where your house stays pristine forever. It’s about creating systems that support your life right now — and recognizing those systems will sometimes need a reset.
Like physical fitness, organization requires ongoing practice and maintenance. They aren’t identities we achieve once — they’re states we maintain through consistent action.
An organized home won’t eliminate stress entirely, but it can reduce unnecessary friction, help mornings run smoother, and free up mental energy for the things that matter most.
Why I Call Myself a “Recovering Messy Kid”
I often joke that I’m a recovering messy kid — not because I’m embarrassed by it, but because I want people to understand that organization is something I learned over time.
I was taught some organizing skills growing up, many of which I simply didn’t adopt as a young person. But as an adult, I started to realize how much I struggled to function in spaces that felt chaotic or disorganized. I felt mentally overwhelmed, spent unnecessary energy searching for things, and constantly felt behind.
What changed for me was realizing this wasn’t just “who I was.” There were systems, habits, and environmental changes within my control that could make everyday life feel calmer and more manageable.
Over time, I built systems for myself and my family that reduced friction and supported the way we actually live. Do we still have to maintain them? Absolutely. But it takes far less energy to do a quick reset than it does to constantly live in a state of overwhelm.
Because organization is not who you are. It’s something you learn, practice, and maintain over time — just like fitness. And if you’re in a season where your systems no longer work for you, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It may simply mean you need a reset, a new approach, or a little support getting started again.
For more information, contact Corinne Berry, PhD.
